I took this picture three times, with three different male models. I edited all of them too.
Here’s what I realized from the first picture I edited : Not everyone who claims they want to protect you will, and not everyone you want to protect wants your protection.
Here’s what I learned from the second picture I edited : Your friends will be there for you way after that one dude who doesn’t see your shine. Trust them, not him.
Here’s what I figured out from the third picture I edited : Sometimes, all you have is you so you have to be strong enough to deal with yourself.
The last one, the one shown, is my favourite.
This week has been a month. This month has been a year. I know I’m not the only one feeling this way, and I’m hoping in part that it’s mostly the effects of lockdown and the lack of RL hugs and interaction I’m getting right now. However, what I won’t stop doing is putting my trust in people. The sooner you trust, the sooner you learn whether they’re worth it. If you never trust, you’ll never know.
In true heartbroken woman style, I changed my profile, ripped off the ‘Pickle’ name from my display and am currently running around secondlife with just my log-in and a smile. Come after me, all you want. I won’t come back. I’ll let you have what you need to survive and I’ll be stronger for it, too. You’ll never bring me down further than the holes I’ve already climbed out of, that I created for myself.
Is this a mental health monday? Kind of. But it’s for me. Admittedly most of my mental health mondays are for me, but this one moreso. I am still learning, but every new experience brings with it more confidence, and for that I’m grateful. I’ll take feeling too much over not feeling at all ANY day, I’m a better person because of the depth of my emotions and I’m really starting to feel peace within myself – and if no one else will protect me, I will.
Today I’m concentrating the credits on the decor & the pose, #notsorry.
Make it a beautiful day, Spoonies. Wash your hands, don’t touch your face, stay socially distanced and be an ally for the LGBTQIA+ community and the BLM movement. It’s hard to remember that we all need kindness until we’re at our darkest, but don’t let it get that far before you take a stand. xoxo.